This show exhibited everything that’s wrong with Sydney’s theatre scene. Legends! is an almost two-hour long, trying and tired tirade of sentimentality. The crowds are drawn by Hayley and Juliet Mills and this is the only reason they’re there.
When the climax of the first act is of the energetic variety brought solely by a black stripper, and almost the entire action of the second a consequence of eating the black housemaid Aretha’s “black magic voodoo huju brownies” (i.e. hash brownies for the uninitiated or residing in the dark ages of narcotic humour), and that very action is mistimed, poorly performed slapstick... a self-respecting audience member may feel there’s something left to be desired. Some things, even. Everything, perhaps.
Jokes that flat-line from repetition, anachronistic racial slurs and explicit contempt for paupers are soaked up by misplaced laughter and courteous applause. Caricatures replace characters without authentic comedic reason, and the biggest laugh of the night was drawn by a jarring reference to Facebook. Ha. This programming choice is nothing short of regicide for the Theatre Royal’s place in the contemporary Sydney scene. A fantastic expression is “to let bygones be bygones”. Legends!, however, harps on about a bygone era of Hollywood that is completely alien to a modern audience. Its entire appeal is based on reliving the backwards funnies of a time before social progress. That said, if executed with style or finesse, it could still be a show worth watching. Unfortunately, it isn’t.
