"I've got three dick piercings, so get your iPhones ready."
Round two of Hiatus Kaiyote's sold out Melbourne leg of the Choose Your Weapon tour begins with washed-out and wailing dark synth beats from 0.1, usually known as Kirkis. Dressed in paint-splattered overalls with a large hole near the crotch, 0.1 is scared he'll do a Lenny Kravitz. "I've got three dick piercings, so get your iPhones ready," he warns.
Speaking of dicks, all ten male members of Sex On Toast burst on stage looking schmicko dressed all in black. Lead singer Angus Leslie's mutton chop sideburns look particularly fetching during love track Oh Loretta! Man, Leslie even gives his hero Rick James a run for his money, vocal-wise, on this blazing-hot soul number. Seriously sharp horns, funky bass slapping and Motown-worthy dance moves get punters fired up with all the irrepressible Sex On Toast energy. Even the band members can't help but fall to the ground stroking their bodies during Hold My Love, it's all so damn 'tonay'. Bassoons, trumpets, cowbells, men swaying back and forth clicking their fingers wearing sunglasses on stage - the band live up to the exceptionally high standard set by their name. Hot.
Playful keyboard twinkles, then the subsequent screams and forward crowd surge signal the beginning of Hiatus Kaiyote's set. The band start with Breathing Underwater and the audience immediately shifts into slow-swaying, shoulder-popping, hero worship gear. Old fave Nakamarra starts off like an elegant ballad before the Simon Mavin-Paul Bender-Perrin Moss trinity of rhythm gods take it straight back to funkytown where it belongs. Watching drummer Moss and bass player Bender rocking out together up the back, gleefully smiling at each other, is a joy. Behind a stack of Korgs, Mavin twinkles out the lovely keys riff to By Fire, yet another beautifully performed track eliciting cheers and howls from the dancefloor. The World It Softly Lulls takes the beauty up a notch further, with Nai Palm twirling and bouncing behind the mic, before leaving the band alone on stage to mess about with some mesmerising improvisation for a blessedly long time. She comes back on to finish it off, before granting the wishes, like a sweetheart fairy godmother, of the "baby girl down the front row who requested it about six times" by singing the divinely gospel-style Building A Ladder. It's no fucking wonder this tour is almost sold out, Hiatus Kaiyote are the ultimate live performance band bringing serious joy with their music.