And have no money left for gifts, because you'll want them all.
Let's face it: store-bought Christmas cards can kind of suck.
The "funny" cards are never funny, and no Golden Casket is progressive enough to stock cards that address anything but the most traditional of relationships, so the whole experience can be pretty limiting.
And Christmas ornaments? Mate, you've bought one bauble from Kmart, you've bought them all.
Luckily, the eagle eyes at the ever-reliable source of internet miscellanea and obscurity that is Dangerous Minds have spotted a few options for the more alternatively minded Christmas fans among you: namely, rock-themed and other stylistically musical ornaments and greeting cards for the whole family to accept through gritted teeth as they pretend to understand your tastes and choices, even though they've obviously always found "that Nick Cave bloke" a little bit bleak.
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Firstly, as DM reports, if you're looking to spruce up your greeting card options, The Fidorium — at online house of homemade horrors products Etsy — features an array of brilliantly offbeat Christmas outings that feature a Grinched-up Cave ("Grincherman", ha), Johnny Marr under some mistletoe, Mariah Carey and a double entendre, Wham! looking pretty Wham!my, as well as covers for Debbie Harry and Noel Gallagher plus some puns. Also, birds, which isn't on-message but c'mon, it's birds.
If you're interested for year-round salutations purposes, they also have a tonne of non-Christmas-specific greeting cards themed around Aphex Twin, Kate Bush, Grace Jones, Robert Smith, Depeche Mode, St Vincent, Brian Eno, Siouxsie Sioux and more.
Speaking of Sioux, she features as one of the awesome ornaments created by artist Matthew Lineham — the "A Very New Wave Christmas" line — that are up for sale at his store.
Well, were for sale — he's, uh, actually sold out of them all, because look at them.
Also spotted and highlighted (highlit?… nah, that can't be right) by Dangerous Minds, the quirky, wordplay-heavy ornaments delve deep into pop-culture throwback territory to create gems such as "Siouxsie Lou Who", a meeting of Siouxsie Sioux and Cindy Lou Who from How The Grinch Stole Christmas, "Saint Nick" Cave, Robert Smith riding Rudolph and embodying the spirit of a "Merry Smithmas", Devo's distinct headwear gets the Christmas-tree treatment, and the ever-riffable Morrissey takes the form of "Snow Mozzer" and "Heat Mozzer", a play on Snow Miser and Heat Miser, characters from 1974 stop-motion flick The Year Without A Santa Claus, among others.
Like we said, though — all sold out for 2016, so better get your order in early in time for next year's tree.
Check out the range of ornaments below, or stare longingly through the window here.