The Beards, Journalist

The ARIA Awards were a farce, and now the end of the world is near.

Breakfast can be tough for a bearded man. Cereal is right out – getting milk and bits of oat all through your beard can ruin your entire day.

Melbourne is notorious for the scarf-wearers I mentioned earlier. I should be clear at this point that the scarf is a symbol of bearded oppression.

Gertrude got my attention. She showed me a poster she had made for me and said she’d do anything for me in the bedroom – anything!

Johann Beardraven of The Beards will tackle a broken arm any day, unless his beard is still intact.

A story about The Lonely Wife, The Dedicated Beard Grower and The Beardless Youth.