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Suburban Party 'Totally Ruined' By Playlist Control Freaks

30 May 2014 | 4:09 pm | SPA Confidential

"After about a minute and a half of Death Cab's 'The Sound Of Settling', a group of bros pulling buckets in the laundry ... demanded someone put on some 50 Cent."

A house party in the Brisbane suburb of Morningside descended into tense chaos last night as conflict arose over the choice of songs on the evening's playlist.

The party, advertised privately on Facebook as "Freddie's Farewell And Fuck Off Festival", was held at the house of fixie enthusiast and professional hipster Fred Ora, Queensland police told SPA Confidential.

"Essentially, what seems to have happened is that certain parties have taken issue with the music selection for the night," Constable Rick Pummelhorse said. "We are led to believe that, around the sixth spin of Iggy Azalea's Fancy, an unidentified attendee ripped the speaker cord out of Mr Ora's iPod in a rage and plugged it into his own, proceeding to queue up hours' worth of Death Cab For Cutie and Phoenix tracks."

Rebecca Segal, an inner-city marketing executive who was attending the party, said that was only the beginning of the conflict. "After about a minute and a half of Death Cab's The Sound Of Settling, a group of bros pulling buckets in the laundry caved in to their misplaced feelings of self-importance and demanded someone put on some 50 Cent," she said. "That didn't go down well with the indie rock fans, who then started insulting the 50 Cent guys in a misguided attempt to showcase the power of brains over brawn.

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"That's when the first punch got thrown."

Police have confirmed that the song playing as Nicholas "Fragile Nick" Corduroy ate floor at the hands of three-time Bad Boy underground boxing champ Bruce "Manslaughter" Slater was Imogen Heap's Hide And Seek, which Segal believes a cheeky partygoer queued up on the sly as a direct and belated homage to the second-season finale of The OC (and/or the consequent Dear Sister meme that scene spawned).

Mr Ora would not respond at length to SPA Confidential's enquiries, only saying, "Death Cab fucking sucks," and expressing his disappointment at the effect overbearing partygoers had on the evening.

"They totally ruined my night," he lamented. "One minute, it's all about Freddie and his love of Fancy, and the next I've got some four-eyed weakling spontaneously growing a spine and projecting his awful taste in music on a house full of innocent people."

"It's just completely uncalled for."