Melbourne International Comedy Festival

"She's not being humble about it."

"I have no idea why my girlfriend puts up with me."

"If it's written well, performed well and it's funny, you can do a routine about helium depletion."

"Even after ten years you still get nervous about what you're going to say on stage."

"I want to see more brown sex symbols, ya know. I want to be a brown sex symbol!"

More than 10 shows will offer a rate reduced by 16.2%

"People don't want to pay to hear me talking about how I've found inner peace. They'd just tell me to fuck off."

"It's a show full of what I call evidence-based musings for a post-truth world."

"It was just this sensational thing where suddenly this drug addicted homeless man just had all the higher status."

The yearly mecca for fans of all things funny hits town from 29 March to 23 April

A taste of the East Coast run