Bukowski Talk Us Through The Creation Of Debut Album 'I Don’t Wanna Live, I Don’t Wanna Die.'

Just a few weeks ago, Naarm/Melbourne emo punk outfit Bukowski ended an immensely long wait with the release of I Don’t Wanna Live, I Don’t Wanna Die., their eagerly-anticipated debut album.

Having first released music by way of their Grow Up. Give Up. Let Go EP in 2017, Bukowski found themselves becoming a staple of the local music scene until 2021, when they embarked upon a bit of a creative hiatus.

Thankfully, that all came to an end last year when the group returned with news that their debut album would finally find its way into the world this year.

“This is one for the quiet little whispers of desperation,” the group explained. “The tiny fractures in the quiet that only you can feel. A deep perilous gasp caught, as it tries to implore for the sweet relief of life’s unrelenting cycle. The whispered pleas falling on deaf ears. The battle between holding on or letting go.

“We stand at the crossroads; I don’t wanna live, I don’t wanna die.”

With plenty of global airplay, acclaim, and support slots for stellar acts, Bukowski are running headfirst into 2025 in a big way. In fact, just this week the band will be landing in Ireland to launch a UK/Europe tour supporting fellow Melburnians Slowly Slowly.

With the new album out in the world, and a tour of the UK and Europe just about to kick off, Bukowksi’s vocalist and guitarist James Karagiozis shared a deep dive into each of the tracks on their long-awaited debut record.

1. I Don’t Wanna Live

I remember wanting to write a song to open an album, it was very much written with that intention. I remember trying to write a guitar riff that ‘travelled’ for the verse and honestly, I cannot even remember how I wrote it, but I’m very happy with how it has turned out. The story of this song itself is one of writing from the point of view of ‘anxiety’ talking to the being it inhabits. The chorus is a play on a blasé anecdote of a generation, ‘oh kill me now’.

2. Til I’m Dead

This is a love song. Every line tells a true story of a long moment in my life that I thought would last forever. It’s a classic, I wrote a song for the girl, alas, like everything; nothing lasts forever.

3. What Do You Want Me to Be

I remember we were already working in pre-production for the album and combing through ideas and I bought a shelled-out musical version of the song with the only penned lyric being ‘What do you want me to be’. Everyone was vibing it hard, so I worked with Jack to really dig for some gold. It was basically a letter to an ex-lover asking what they wanted from me, but also, me just being, “I’m just trying to make you laugh.”

4. I’m Alone

This is probably the oldest song of the bunch. I think this one is from a batch of songs I only had phone audio demos of, pre-Bukowski. I just started noodling it at a jam session one time and Benji was just like, “Ummmm what’s that?!” It piqued some interest so it got a run. A break up song about, like, the feeling you’re watching yourself live your own life, sometimes breakups are like an out of body experience. Al you yearn for is that person one more time.

5. twentytwentythree

This one was written when I was in the depths of a breakup that I didn’t really see coming. My exact feelings in the moment as I was trying to process what was happening. It was a hard song to get over the line for the album, but I’m stoked that I fought for it and it made it. It’s one of my favourites, I remember the moments vividly. I’m glad that I can see a better version of myself on the other side of the song.

6. One Hundred Seconds

This was quite a collaboration for the album. We were mid-writing and had a show come up. In the middle of that rehearsal I was just riffing the exact riff in the song and everyone just stopped what we were doing and started piecing it together. Within about maybe 45 minutes we had the bones and the lyrics. Then we decided we would play it at the show the next night and the rest is history.

7. Elevator Song

This is one of the truest my earnest songs I’ve ever written. My true thoughts about my own life. Growing up, going to church was a big part of my life. I wouldn’t say the same now, but the lessons I learned and the teachings I learnt still inform a lot of the decisions I make today. I find myself having a constant battle in over my mind over my beliefs. I feel like this song is my most concise description of those internal discussions to date.

8. Superweak

So, this one is still such a surprise to me. It kind of fell out of my brain. I had just bought a new guitar and started noodling on it. I remember texting Benji while I was demoing this and telling him how excited I was, meanwhile he was ill and texted me, “Man I just feel like super weak.” Bingo, it hit me – that was a lyric. I wrote this one from my perspective of what I thought anxiety was, not knowing, my idea of anxiety was actually my own ANXIETY. This one fell out, by a new guitar and it will show you something. thank you Paranormal Squier Super-Sonic x.

9. Brood 2

Quite a deep look at the inner workings of my mind. These lyrics took a long time to work together and were penned on the only day I had booked to track them (or so I thought at the time). On my long drive from Sunshine to Lilydale, I had my notebook and pen out, the song on repeat, and kept stopping, rewinding and penning short anecdotes. This one is a personal deep dive on how I view myself, a little unforgiving sometimes.

10. Sow

I was stumbling around at a party and saw a guitar in a quiet room. I picked it up and started strumming the chord progression. I turned my voice recorder on and hummed basically the whole melody and chord progression into my phone. Over the next few days I listened back over it and penned the lyrics.

A kind of apathetic anthem of where I find myself sometimes: wanting more but not wanting to work for it, sick of how things are and not wanting to change it, being constantly instantly gratified and losing the drive to find true meaning. But does it even matter?

11. I Don’t Wanna Die

Short and concise. Another love song. Finding myself in the middle of a lockdown, with my partner at the time, a little ode to simple things in life that keep our focus. I had been hearing quite regularly over the last five years, terms like ‘kill me now’ or ‘God, when will this all end’ – a kind of beckoning for the end when life smallest inconveniences arise. It made me think about the value of life and things we find value in.

I thought this would transform into something different but am very happy where it end and a beautiful final chapter to this album.

Bukowski’s I Don’t Wanna Live, I Don’t Wanna Die. is out now.