Album Review: Unclubbed 2

If the Hyundai Excel is the car for people who have given up trying, then Sacha “Unclubbed” Collisson's recordings of toned-down club classics provide the soundtrack. As one half of Aurora, the British keyboardist has made a career out of reinventing other people's hits in a way that won't wake the children on the long drive to the shops. His first set sold well enough in the servos, so here's the second volume of covers from the likes of Robert Miles, Kosheen and Robyn.

The formula is predictable enough and, to be absolutely fair, starts somewhat inoffensively. Calvin Harris' I'm Not Alone does okay, slightly downtempo'd with a vocal from Jenny Lynn Smith that could sit comfortably in Nouvelle Vague's catalogue. Kosheen's Hide U benefits from lush strings and a punchy rhythm section, standing out as the closest we get to an improvement on the original. The novelty quickly wears thin and by the halfway point, the rot of tedium has made itself very much at home. Collisson's 'Slow it down and stretch it out' recipe to manipulate emotions is brutally ineffective on Empire Of the Sun's We Are the People and Donna Summer's I Feel Love, while session singer Gerard O'Connell wrings any traces of sincerity from With Every Heartbeat and Only Love Can Break Your Heart (St. Etienne's model of the Neil Young song).

Then there is the wretched version of Moby's Go which seems recorded purely to earn an easy buck from an arty car commercial. Put this disc in your Excel's stereo and you can safely say it's over.