Relatively speaking, it’s only early. It’s 8pm on a Saturday, but there’s already a sea of offensive shirts and tattoos spilling out from Crowbar onto the streets of the Valley while Slayer and Dead Kelly graces everybody’s ears (well, perhaps not the elderly couple stepping off the bus into the middle of it all, but you can’t please everyone now, can you?).

Collosvs have escaped the trams and hipsters of Melbourne and travelled north to bring their million-miles-an-hour set to a crowd that’s starting to really kick into gear. Transitioning from thrashy riffs at breakneck speeds to nu-metal-esque phrases with a groove that takes control of your neck, the five-piece even have the security guard headbanging. The set finishes with the band being joined by High Tension and King Parrot vocalists for a rendition of Bathory’s Satan My Master, a fitting finisher considering who’s next to take the stage.

Every up-and-coming punk/metal vocalist should be going to High Tension gigs and studying the art of stage presence, because this crew from Melbourne has it mastered. Vocalist Karina Utomo commands attention as she stares down the first rows of the pit one person at a time and proceeds to unleash a demonic screech that puts the greatest heavy vocalists to shame; all the while the fuzzy, driving riffs provided by the band give ample opportunities to swing an elbow or two. Towards the end of the set as the triple j-featured High Risk, High Rewards sends the crowd into even more of a frenzy. One can’t help but wonder how these guys are not much, much bigger. 

By now the dank depths of Crowbar are packed shoulder-to-shoulder, there’s a smell in the pit that one wouldn’t wish on their worst enemy and nobody is quite sure what fluid just got splashed on them but that’s just fine. After all, this is the environment in which Aussie metal is born and thrives. King Parrot burst into a frenzied mass of manic riffs and blast-beats as the pit turns into a mess of limbs similar to a Looney Tunes fight scene. These guys exemplify a band not taking themselves too seriously as they roam the stage shirtless and shameless and Wayne Slattery is breaking into a smile from ear to ear. Behind the comical song titles like Shit On The Liver, however, are some seriously heavy tunes so tightly executed that it’s easy to see why these guys have risen to the top of the Aussie metal scene.

It’s a showcase of some of Australia’s best and heaviest that has everybody leaving with ringing ears, sweat-damaged phones and, it must be said, ravaged livers… and they couldn’t be happier about it.