When a well-oiled machine like Elton John's Farewell Yellow Brick Road tour, which will see the Rocket Man performing over 300 shows in three years, rolls into town, let's face it: it ain't gonna be shit.
Rod Laver's GA section is in seated configuration this evening and scattered lights - some red, some blue - blink around the stadium's periphery courtesy of one of Elton John's merch items: novelty sunnies, of course.
The opening chords of Bennie And The Jets are punctuated by extended spells of silence to tease the audience. Stage lights bounce off diamantes on the lapels of Sir Elton's swanky black suit as well as his diamante-framed sunnies - he's like a human mirrorball up there!
An intricately carved picture frame - within which we locate some John-referencing words: Gucci, Billy Elliot and Soul Train - borders crystal-clear visuals. Humorous stills featuring couples and families on vacation, often looking completely over it, accompany I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues. While we admire John's piano virtuosity, the backing vocals ("Laughing like chil-dren/Living like lo-vers") are as spot-on as they are on record.
John's crack backing band features three gents providing the beats: drummer Nigel Olsson plus two percussionists, Ray Cooper and John Mahon, who brandish a range of exotic percussion instruments in exaggerated, theatrical fashion.
Elton John @ Rod Laver Arena. Photo by Jaz Meadows.
Having mainly played outdoor, winery gigs during his Australian visit thus far, John says he's happy not to be the target of "dive bombing bugs" tonight and his banter is very considered throughout. Introducing Border Song, John tells us he thanked the late Queen Of Soul, Aretha Franklin, whenever he saw her for choosing to record a song that was written by "two young English kids" (himself and Bernie Taupin) since it gave them so much confidence. Tiny Dancer is the epic singalong we always hoped it would be. Set highlight Indian Sunset is performed with gusto by just John and percussionist Cooper, whose bongo and tamba-playing prowess elevate the arrangement.
Those assembled who went to see biopic Rocketman almost feel like we know John. As the rest of his backing players return to the stage, John confirms one scene during which he's depicted sitting down at the piano and placing Taupin's lyric sheets on the music stand before melodies - basically a fully formed song - pour out through his fingers. Such is the vivid nature of the stories Taupin creates through his lyrics that a whole world opens up in John's imagination, he says, and then Rocket Man (I Think It's Going To Be A Long, Long Time) takes flight.
We eagerly anticipate Funeral For A Friend/Love Lies Bleeding and this section is astounding as expected. A dazzling guitar solo from Davey Johnstone leaves us shook; his fingers scurry up and down those frets like a tarantula on speed. Visuals of a chandelier and candles add elegance.
Elton John @ Rod Laver Arena. Photo by Jaz Meadows.
During Candle In The Wind, John's Yamaha grand glides smoothly across the stage as if the floor is coated with ice. He is repositioned in this way at various points throughout the show. A dad and his daughter in the row behind us sing along enthusiastically to Daniel - must be 'their song'. It would be rude to remain seated during I’m Still Standing and so we all spring up to bust some daggy dance moves, which continue throughout Crocodile Rock and Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting - it's so incredibly fun barking along with that percussive, repetitive, "Sa-tur-day/Sa-tur-day/Sa/tur-day!" part while punching the the air like a belligerent toddler!
The winning encore couplet of Your Song ("How wonderful life is while you're in the world" - seriously, as if you'd ever mind someone putting that sentiment down in words!?) and (almost) tour namesake Goodbye Yellow Brick Road - complete with those soaring choruses and sublime, Beach Boys-esque harmonies - is flawless. The archival footage that flashes up onscreen - with John dressed in all manner of flamboyant outfits including Donald Duck and his Amadeus look - is a fitting tribute to the great man. Sure, there’s ample colour and movement in this concert, but it really is all about one man, his exquisite catalogue of songs, elastic vocal range and nimble fingers. He may be giving up the touring, but will still play one-off shows and residencies so you'll just have to travel to his live shows if you suffer Elton withdrawals after this tour wraps. Elton John deals memories to treasure.
And the number of disgruntled faces departing the arena? Exactly zero.