“My gut isn’t working properly, my skin is worse than ever, I’ve gotten sick half a dozen times.”
Royals singer Lorde is facing a brand-new upheaval as she details living with a mystery illness and going through heartbreak.
Addressing fans through her signature email newsletter, Lorde revealed that her body is “really inflamed” and “trying to tell me something and I’m trying to support it but nothing seems to help and I get frustrated.”
She went on to tell fans, “My gut isn’t working properly, my skin is worse than ever, I’ve gotten sick half a dozen times.” As well as the health issues she detailed in her latest newsletter, Lorde arrived with the realisation that “listening to my body is hard for me, it’s something I never really learned how to do.
“I’ve been trying to teach myself that this year, but it’s been hard actually, pretty confronting, has made me fully aware of all the times I ignored it or didn’t give it what it needed, shamed it for a fight or flight response, took a handful of pills and pushed through,” she wrote.
In the letter, Lorde wrote that she stopped taking the “little yellow pill I took every morning for thousands of mornings since I was 15” five days ago and is going to see how she goes from there.
In addition to the mystery health issues, Lorde detailed her recent heartbreak and an experience with mushrooms earlier this year.
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“It’s different but the same,” Lorde said about “living with heartbreak”. “I ache all the time, I forget why and then remember. I’m not trying to hide from the pain, I understand now that pain isn’t something to hide from, that there’s actually great beauty in moving with it.”
She continued, “But sometimes I’m sick of being with myself. I eat chocolate to try and manipulate the endorphins, bring back the sweet happiness of Easter morning. I sit in the time machine and wait for it to move, but it hasn’t been invented yet.”
Lorde will remain in London before travelling to New York soon (presumably for songwriting sessions?) before heading home to New Zealand.
In November 2022, Lorde used her email newsletter to open up about the state of touring, which she wrote, “Touring has become a demented struggle to break even or face debt.”
In a March 2023 live review of Lorde at the Sidney Myer Music Bowl, The Music reviewer Michael Prebeg declared, “It's noticeable that the version of Lorde on stage tonight is older, wiser, more confident and more secure.”