If you bought this record, you have every right to return it.
So here it is; My first review for
KYS. What a shame that I have to start off on such a terrible, terrible
foot. I must admit, I have heard the name Alesana a fair few times,
but I have never actually heard any of their material before. Lucky
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me.
From the moment ‘This Is Usually
The Part Where People Scream’ kicks in, you know you’re in for
a pretty bumpy ride. With awful tone, the cheesy “fake-metal” riffing
instantly gives you that “Oh no…What have I just purchased?” feeling,
and things don’t get much better from there. Once the vocals come
in, it gets a lot worse, with woeful screams and pitchy melodic singing
that even Auto-Tune couldn’t fix.
‘Goodbye, Goodnight, For Good’ starts off with a little vocal “hook” (term used loosely), and then
gets rolling with some up-tempo beats, and a barrage of shit-sounding
screams. As if one bad singer in a band like Alesana isn’t enough,
these guys have 4. That’s right, 4 guys all competing for worst vocalist
of the year award; and they’re all in the same band. Lucky they redeemed
themselves by throwing in a breakdown right? Wrong. I would have thought
screamo bands would have wised up to the fact that they’re never going
to be as heavy as Misery Signals, so they may as well not try.
Moving on, and what is apparently the
band’s most (in)famous track ‘Seduction’, lets in with some whiney and irritating vocals, and some more-of-the-same
guitar riffs. By now (track 3), it’s clear that all of the structures
are going to be pretty formulated, as most of Alesana’s fans probably
wouldn’t realise that they’re listening to pretty much the same
track, just with different words thrown in. This track features on the
latest Vans Warped Tour compilation, and if this is the best track they
have to offer, then pickings look pretty slim.
At times, the band seem to suffer musical
schizophrenia, namely in tracks such as ‘The Uninvited Thirteenth’ and ‘And They Call This Tragedy’. The latter swings from your standard screamo ballad to a failed attempt
at a black metal song, complete with bree-vocals and a half-time breakdown,
only to end on a drawn out line that sounds like it was directly ripped
from Thursday’s Full Collapse.
the curtain was Steve Evetts. This is a guy who has worked on and produced
some amazing albums, with bands including Saves The Day, Dillinger Escape
Plan, Lifetime, ETID, and the list goes on. He alone, has given this
release any saving graces. Production wise, there isn’t really anything
to pick at, and when you have songs this shit produced that well, props
must go to Mr. Evetts.
Bands like this are the reason that
so many actual decent and deserving bands don’t get their just desserts.
As long as idiot kids buy shit music like this, record labels are just
going to keep dishing it out. If you bought this record, you have every
right to return it, and let the store know that it is aurally defective.
1.
This Is Usually The Part Where People Scream
2.
Goodbye, Goodnight, For Good
3.
Seduction
4.
A Most Profound Quiet
5.
Red And Dying Evening
6.
Better Luck Next Time, Prince Charming
7.
The Uninvit