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Is This The Greatest VIP Package Ever?

We think so.

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We suspect Bodyjar are taking the piss out of recent VIP tour bundles with their own outlandish and brilliant “once in a life-time” packages.

Their 20th anniversary tour kicks off in Brisbane at The Hi-Fi on Thursday 7 August, and if you've got a spare $3,000 lying around can buy into the SILVER package.

Dropping 3K means you get the privilege of loading the band's gear in and out of the venue (while completely sober), and spending two minutes of one-on-one time with guitarist Tom Read in a cubicle as he “takes his nervous pre show shit”.

You'll also score a selfie with drummer Grant Relf's “gig jocks”, get a pair of semi-functional iPhone 3 earphones, and one piece of leftover 2013 tour merch.

To top it all off, you get to take the boys out to dinner at a five-star restaurant and cover the bill.

If you'd like to opt into the GOLD package, it'll set you back $5,000 and gets you all of the above, plus a fruit platter.