Band Abused After Putting Cute Cat On Album Cover

An emerging Australian band has been subject to the anger and fury of the music listening - and wider Australian - public after the cover art for their debut album was branded as "both tasteless and offensive".

Hailing from the New South Wales south coast, the artwork for indie-rock five-piece Johnson Extended's album, Hey, Can I Buy You A Vodka Raspberry? features a cat playing with a ball of string on a couch. The artwork was revealed yesterday and has since been the subject of a vicious industry-wide tirade. It is believed that the band's members have even gone into hiding following death threats.

One of the most vocal critics of the cover has been leading music industry blogger Don Trustmé. 

"It's an abomination," Trustmé wrote. "Not only is it degrading to music in Australia - and music as a whole - but it's not even funny. Not even remotely. I can't look at it, it's just disgusting. How could these guys have made such a poor error of judgment?"

SPA Confidential hit the streets of Australia today to gauge the reaction of the average citizen. We had to stop after 15 minutes, as three of the first ten people we showed threw up, while another four said they would be taking up religion.

"I'm not a religious person," said one lady, "but this is too far. If the government can't stop people from posting pictures of cute cats, I'm turning to the first church I can find."

Meanwhile legal expert Terrance Lawbringer admitted that the Government Of Australia had legal grounds to not only stop the album from being released, but even deport the band.

"I'm so god-damn sick of fucking cats," we heard him say, while hiding underneath his table at a fancy Melbourne restaurant today. "Every fucking day I get an email from my halfwit brother-in-law with a new God-damn picture of a cat cuddling a dog or a cat looking at a camera. Well fuck dip-shit, what you you do if someone ten times your size followed you around all day with his iPhone? You'd probably think, 'What the fuck is wrong with this mope?'

"I mean, shit. The worst part is that he thinks that by finding cute pictures girls will see his sensitive side. No, shithead, it just shows potential suitors that you're a right royal, grade-A, 24-carat, bona-fide plonker."

We asked him to comment on the Johnson Extended case specifically after following him into the bathroom and he replied, "What the fuck are you doing following me into a toilet to talk about my johnson?"

SPA Confidential attempted to track down the band's frontman Tom Brabham by asking his mum out on a date only to discover that he's been disowned by his family this morning and his girlfriend tried to stab him. We did find his email though and he replied to us from an internet cafe/corner store in Yackandandah.

"What have I done?" the email read. "I didn't know what I was doing. I was searching the internet and thought it would be funny. I was thinking about starting a new uni course and saw the pictures on a college forum. I didn't know how much damage it would do."

It is believed there were to be pictures of a dog and an otter, similar to the cat cover one, in the CD's inlay artwork, but all known copies and mock-ups have been destroyed.

SPA Confidential is taking the opportunity of this shocking wake-up call to rally the people of Australia behind our new campaign: Cute Cats Out Of Our Music Scene. You can show your support by depositing money straight into our secure bank account with the Royal Swiss Bank. Email us for details.